Tuesday, September 14, 2004
DEADLY WEATHER AND ACTS OF GOD
With all this talk of tropical storms in the news lately, it has gotten me to thinking about the weather, hurricanes and tornadoes especially.
It seems that whenever the weather in a given area results in death and destruction, it is generally referred to time and time again as an “act of God.” When I hear this I think, “If this is an act of God, then God must be one mean son of a bitch.” I mean, if my house is levelled by a category 5 tornado, am I supposed to feel blessed?
“Oh, what a wonderful day! My home is destroyed, half of my family is dead and my Superman underwear are in a tree around the corner....praise the Lord! Hallelujah!!”
Hurricanes Frances and Ivan have killed dozens of people in the past week. With that being said, I hope the folks over at the Weather Channel are on the horn to the Pope. I do believe we got ourselves a good, old-fashioned miracle on our hands.
With all this talk of tropical storms in the news lately, it has gotten me to thinking about the weather, hurricanes and tornadoes especially.
It seems that whenever the weather in a given area results in death and destruction, it is generally referred to time and time again as an “act of God.” When I hear this I think, “If this is an act of God, then God must be one mean son of a bitch.” I mean, if my house is levelled by a category 5 tornado, am I supposed to feel blessed?
“Oh, what a wonderful day! My home is destroyed, half of my family is dead and my Superman underwear are in a tree around the corner....praise the Lord! Hallelujah!!”
Hurricanes Frances and Ivan have killed dozens of people in the past week. With that being said, I hope the folks over at the Weather Channel are on the horn to the Pope. I do believe we got ourselves a good, old-fashioned miracle on our hands.
Thursday, September 02, 2004
THE MASOCHISTIC STATES OF AMERICA
i swear, this goddamn country can be so masochistic sometimes. We say we want a President who tells the truth, so we elect a liar. We want a President who is for the working man, so we elect a president who screws the middle class.
Bush might as well start dressing up as a dominatrix, complete with leather outfit, whips and nipple clamps. Instead of calling him President, we can just call him "Mistress Bush" or something. Then, instead of claiming outrage when he pisses everyone off, we can just say “Thank you Mistress, may we have another?”
MCCAIN, WE HARDLY KNEW YE
Does anyone else remember not too long ago when John McCain was cast as a progressive among conservatives in the Republican Party?
Four years ago McCain was a worthy challenger in the primaries against George W. Bush. McCain was a war hero and a no-BS kind of guy. A real straight shooter. He had a great shot at winning the nomination until an “independent” smear ad reared up on the eve of a crucial South Carolina primary. It cast McCain as a nut job who had gone off the deep end after years in a POW camp during the Vietnam War.
Aside from that, Bush’s spin doctor, Karl Rove, initiated a plan that would prey on South Carolina’s racism. It seems that in phone push polls leading up the election, pollsters would ask questions like, "Would it change your opinion of John McCain if you knew that he fathered an illegitimate african american child?" In present day South Carolina, one doesn’t really have to prove a claim like that. All you really have to do is insinuate it, as they did there to perfection. Then, you can send GW to a speaking gig over at ultra white-wing Bob Jones University and South Carolina has themselves a decision to make. Do you vote for the Vietnam vet for reform who may have sired a black baby, or the redneck?
Luckily for George Bush and Karl Rove, enough South Carolinians were thinking things like, “What? McCain has a nigger baby? McCain’s a nigger lover? To hell with that looney bird POW, I’m pulling the lever for the hillbilly oil man.” Yes, voters bought into it. McCain lost his bid for the nomination.
George Bush and his buddy Karl Rove would later go on to smear Al Gore and snatch the Presidency, but it is their latest attack against John Kerry that troubles me more as it relates to McCain.
The “independently funded” Swift Boat Veterans For Truth have began attacking Kerry’s war record. It seems that Kerry may have only taken a few dozen pieces of shrapnel to obtain his Purple Heart and not a bullet as it states in the official record. I’m sure the Swift Boat vets know this, since only one of the hundreds of men in the organization actually served alongside Kerry during the war. But I digress...
McCain stepped up to the plate initially and called these attack ads “dishonest and dishonorable.” He challenged Bush to disavow them, which the President finally did, although it was weeks after the damage had been done to Mr. Kerry’s reputation. The act wasn’t much different from a general calling a ceasefire after his troops had already burned the village to the ground.
But what I can’t stand is to see McCain speaking at the Republican Convention and stooging for Bush, the same man who has engaged in smear campaigns against him and others. The same President he has accused of feeding off “dishonest and dishonorable” attack ads is now the man he stumps for. McCain, who used to be a man of integrity, has now turned into a man who can’t suck that big, fat Republican dick fast enough.
i swear, this goddamn country can be so masochistic sometimes. We say we want a President who tells the truth, so we elect a liar. We want a President who is for the working man, so we elect a president who screws the middle class.
Bush might as well start dressing up as a dominatrix, complete with leather outfit, whips and nipple clamps. Instead of calling him President, we can just call him "Mistress Bush" or something. Then, instead of claiming outrage when he pisses everyone off, we can just say “Thank you Mistress, may we have another?”
MCCAIN, WE HARDLY KNEW YE
Does anyone else remember not too long ago when John McCain was cast as a progressive among conservatives in the Republican Party?
Four years ago McCain was a worthy challenger in the primaries against George W. Bush. McCain was a war hero and a no-BS kind of guy. A real straight shooter. He had a great shot at winning the nomination until an “independent” smear ad reared up on the eve of a crucial South Carolina primary. It cast McCain as a nut job who had gone off the deep end after years in a POW camp during the Vietnam War.
Aside from that, Bush’s spin doctor, Karl Rove, initiated a plan that would prey on South Carolina’s racism. It seems that in phone push polls leading up the election, pollsters would ask questions like, "Would it change your opinion of John McCain if you knew that he fathered an illegitimate african american child?" In present day South Carolina, one doesn’t really have to prove a claim like that. All you really have to do is insinuate it, as they did there to perfection. Then, you can send GW to a speaking gig over at ultra white-wing Bob Jones University and South Carolina has themselves a decision to make. Do you vote for the Vietnam vet for reform who may have sired a black baby, or the redneck?
Luckily for George Bush and Karl Rove, enough South Carolinians were thinking things like, “What? McCain has a nigger baby? McCain’s a nigger lover? To hell with that looney bird POW, I’m pulling the lever for the hillbilly oil man.” Yes, voters bought into it. McCain lost his bid for the nomination.
George Bush and his buddy Karl Rove would later go on to smear Al Gore and snatch the Presidency, but it is their latest attack against John Kerry that troubles me more as it relates to McCain.
The “independently funded” Swift Boat Veterans For Truth have began attacking Kerry’s war record. It seems that Kerry may have only taken a few dozen pieces of shrapnel to obtain his Purple Heart and not a bullet as it states in the official record. I’m sure the Swift Boat vets know this, since only one of the hundreds of men in the organization actually served alongside Kerry during the war. But I digress...
McCain stepped up to the plate initially and called these attack ads “dishonest and dishonorable.” He challenged Bush to disavow them, which the President finally did, although it was weeks after the damage had been done to Mr. Kerry’s reputation. The act wasn’t much different from a general calling a ceasefire after his troops had already burned the village to the ground.
But what I can’t stand is to see McCain speaking at the Republican Convention and stooging for Bush, the same man who has engaged in smear campaigns against him and others. The same President he has accused of feeding off “dishonest and dishonorable” attack ads is now the man he stumps for. McCain, who used to be a man of integrity, has now turned into a man who can’t suck that big, fat Republican dick fast enough.
