Thursday, May 27, 2004
RETAIL RAGE
I went to Wal-Mart yesterday and, upon approaching the entrance, was smacked right in the face with irony. Right there, next to the automatic doors, was a huge display of assorted flowers made up to look like an American flag. A lot of people probably thought that was just delightful, but I don’t think patriotic pride is what Wal-Mart was full of.
I couldn’t believe the audacity of the whole scene. Isn’t Wal-Mart the company that was caught hiring illegal immigrants and paying them slave wages for janitorial service? Isn’t Wal-Mart the company that used to claim “We Buy American,” all the while using Chinese sweat shop labor? And wasn’t Wal-Mart among the companies taking out ”Dead Peasant” policies on it’s employees, insuring THEMSELVES, not the families, when an employee would die? Yes, yes and yes. How American! How patriotic! How horrible.
The bottom line is that Wal-Mart is a disgrace and seeing their little “display” made me sick to my stomach. The least I can do is not shop there anymore. I’m not going to patronize a business that shockingly arrogant.
I went to Wal-Mart yesterday and, upon approaching the entrance, was smacked right in the face with irony. Right there, next to the automatic doors, was a huge display of assorted flowers made up to look like an American flag. A lot of people probably thought that was just delightful, but I don’t think patriotic pride is what Wal-Mart was full of.
I couldn’t believe the audacity of the whole scene. Isn’t Wal-Mart the company that was caught hiring illegal immigrants and paying them slave wages for janitorial service? Isn’t Wal-Mart the company that used to claim “We Buy American,” all the while using Chinese sweat shop labor? And wasn’t Wal-Mart among the companies taking out ”Dead Peasant” policies on it’s employees, insuring THEMSELVES, not the families, when an employee would die? Yes, yes and yes. How American! How patriotic! How horrible.
The bottom line is that Wal-Mart is a disgrace and seeing their little “display” made me sick to my stomach. The least I can do is not shop there anymore. I’m not going to patronize a business that shockingly arrogant.
Monday, May 24, 2004
WHORING THE WORDS “HERO” AND “COURAGE”
Have you noticed how recently, especially in the last few years, the words “courage” and “hero” have been consistently whored out? By this I mean that they are improperly used over and over again in such a way that cheapens their real meaning. Allow me to explain using a few examples.
The whoring of words is almost exclusively done when within a sports context. Take the word “hero” first. Michael Jordan was repeatedly referred to as a hero by the media during the span of his career. I remember vividly a made for TV movie chronicling his life entitled, “Michael Jordan: American Hero.” It’s pathetic.
A hero is someone who puts their ass on the line for a greater good. A firefighter who rushes into a burning building to rescue someone else’s child is a hero. A soldier who leaves his life behind to fight for his country’s freedom is a hero. Being able to lead the Chicago Bulls to six NBA championships just does not measure up.
Was Michael Jordan a great athlete? Of course. Did he enthrall the people privileged enough to see him play? Absolutely. But, is he a hero for that? No way. Not even close.
As I said earlier, “courage” is another word frequently misused and, again, normally in a sports context. I can’t count how many times recently I have had to hear sports analysts talk about how “courageous” and “mentally tough” Kobe Bryant is. Why do they say he is courageous and mentally tough, you ask? Because he has been able, on several occasions, to attend a pre-trial hearing in his rape trial in Colorado, then fly back to Los Angeles for a basketball game to score a lot of points the same night.
Does it shock anyone else how amazingly ignorant that is? Does it upset anyone else how Kobe Bryant can go from a possible rapist in the morning to a courageous superstar a few hours later? Whether or not he actually is a rapist is secondary to me. At the very least he is an adulterer. He doesn’t deserve any respect for that. It’s truly sad when a man can engage in something as treacherous and despicable as adultery, yet still be held up as a role model just because he is famous and can score 30 points in a basketball game. Seriously, will they still be heralding him if it turns out he raped the girl?
Look, words exist for a reason. When their meaning is cheapened so that a journalist can add a bit of zest to his broadcast, it undermines their profession and it devalues our language. Slang or hyperbole is one thing, but this is something else entirely. Simply put, it needs to stop now.
Have you noticed how recently, especially in the last few years, the words “courage” and “hero” have been consistently whored out? By this I mean that they are improperly used over and over again in such a way that cheapens their real meaning. Allow me to explain using a few examples.
The whoring of words is almost exclusively done when within a sports context. Take the word “hero” first. Michael Jordan was repeatedly referred to as a hero by the media during the span of his career. I remember vividly a made for TV movie chronicling his life entitled, “Michael Jordan: American Hero.” It’s pathetic.
A hero is someone who puts their ass on the line for a greater good. A firefighter who rushes into a burning building to rescue someone else’s child is a hero. A soldier who leaves his life behind to fight for his country’s freedom is a hero. Being able to lead the Chicago Bulls to six NBA championships just does not measure up.
Was Michael Jordan a great athlete? Of course. Did he enthrall the people privileged enough to see him play? Absolutely. But, is he a hero for that? No way. Not even close.
As I said earlier, “courage” is another word frequently misused and, again, normally in a sports context. I can’t count how many times recently I have had to hear sports analysts talk about how “courageous” and “mentally tough” Kobe Bryant is. Why do they say he is courageous and mentally tough, you ask? Because he has been able, on several occasions, to attend a pre-trial hearing in his rape trial in Colorado, then fly back to Los Angeles for a basketball game to score a lot of points the same night.
Does it shock anyone else how amazingly ignorant that is? Does it upset anyone else how Kobe Bryant can go from a possible rapist in the morning to a courageous superstar a few hours later? Whether or not he actually is a rapist is secondary to me. At the very least he is an adulterer. He doesn’t deserve any respect for that. It’s truly sad when a man can engage in something as treacherous and despicable as adultery, yet still be held up as a role model just because he is famous and can score 30 points in a basketball game. Seriously, will they still be heralding him if it turns out he raped the girl?
Look, words exist for a reason. When their meaning is cheapened so that a journalist can add a bit of zest to his broadcast, it undermines their profession and it devalues our language. Slang or hyperbole is one thing, but this is something else entirely. Simply put, it needs to stop now.
Sunday, May 23, 2004
THE SIMPLE PLEASANTRIES OF LIFE
A couple of days ago I was in the back seat of my parents car being driven back from an afternoon lunch we had together. Once we were about 60 seconds from our house, the song “Freshmen” by the Verve Pipe came on the radio.
Now, I hate most everything on the radio, but this song was big a few years back and I’ve always kind of dug it’s simple melody. This was the first time I’d heard it in quite a while and I was kinda bummed because I knew I wouldn’t get to hear the whole thing. After all, we were almost home.
But just then, like an act of fate, a slow-moving pickup truck pulled out in front of our car from a side street, sputtering the whole way. Well, that 60 second trip turned into about 3 minutes and I was afforded the opportunity to hear the great majority of my song. Sometimes, the simple pleasures really are the best.
STUFF YOU SHOULD DO
These are just my opinions of course, but I have a small list of things everyone should own that I’d like to share.
Music You Should Own
Sludgeworth - “Losers of the Year.” Sludgeworth is a band I’d never heard of until around two years ago when I was searching Interpunk.com for decent music. I’m a big fan of Lookout Record label as they’ve been responsible for many a band that I now enjoy. Sludgeworth isn’t around anymore, but this cd of their best stuff from a few EP’s and LP’s they released in the short time they were together is worth owning. It’s chock full of great power pop songs that everyone should familiarize themselves with. It’s good stuff and I’m glad I bought it.
The Huntingtons - “Self-Titled Album.” These are some really cool guys who release great album after greater album. In an age where many successful bands release one or two radio friendly pop songs to entice people into buying their record brimming with 10 other horrible tunes, the Huntingtons don’t know the meaning of filler...all the songs are hits. It’s just too bad the rest of the country doesn’t know it. Honestly, this may be the group’s final album. It’s a shame too, because I’ve enjoyed every single recording they’ve produced. Do yourself a favor and pick up this album, or any other you can find from this group. Rock n’ Roll!
The Manges - “R Good Enough.” Punk Rock in the United States is on life support and we can all thank MTV and the legions of braindead peons who tune in for screwing it up. This station is guilty of the attempted murder of punk rock, but there’s still a few bands out there carrying the torch. In Europe, in a country called Italy, is one of those very bands...they’re called the Manges. These guys know how to play and they still understand what rock n roll should be about. I’m in their debt, and so are you. Pick up this album and/or anything of theirs you can get off of EBay and enjoy at full volume in your bedroom.
The European Pop Punk Virus - Volumes 1 & 2. These albums are compilations of some of the best rock n’ roll coming out of Europe today. And as much as I’d like to believe otherwise, Europe is producing better bands that this country. If you still in your heart believe that rock music can be great...go find yourself these cd’s and then go find the albums by the bands that have contributed songs to the compilation. Your faith will be restored.
To find any of these releases, go to Interpunk.com and search for them. Interpunk is the best online music store, bar none. They offer reasonable prices on all of their merchandise and they ship fast. They also have a local music section, where you can find bands from your hometown who are selling their merch through the site. Because of that awesome little feature, I’ve been able to find several bands that write good tunes that I plan on following from now on. So head on over to Interpunk and see what you can find in your area.
Television You Should Watch
The Shield is probably the best drama on television right now. A group of dirty cops that protect the peace while getting deeper and deeper into the criminal underworld makes for an entertaining hour every Tuesday night at 10pm. FX, baby!
Cheap Seats is quickly becoming one of my favorite shows. If you haven’t seen it, picture Mystery Science Theater 3000 with a sports theme. And if you haven’t seen Mystery Science Theater, then what the hell is wrong with you? But seriously, it’s two guys named Randy and Jason who watch old sports programming and basically just crack jokes about how lame and cheesy it is. Sometimes it’s kinda stupid, usually it’s insightful, but it’s always funny. I think it’s on Thursdays at 10 now, on ESPN Classics.
Family Plots is one of the best of the “Reality” genre on tv. It follows the life of a family run mortuary and the things they all go through as individuals when certain situations rear their head. For instance, how will the funeral director, who went through the death of his own one year old baby, deal with arranging the funeral of a stillborn infant? This show can be extremely moving at times. It does not shy away from showing the deceased, so squeamish people should beware. However, it has it’s lighter moments too. All in all, it is both education and entertaining. Tune in Mondays at 9pm on A&E.
Movies You Should See
Saw a couple of decent flicks here recently and, ya know, you should see them too.
First was The Cooler. It stars William H. Macy as a guy so unlucky, that the most minute period of interaction with him will change your luck for the worse. He finally meets a girl who loves him for him and his luck changes. The story is set in a casino and features a good performance by Alec Baldwin as well. Pick it up for it’s good acting. Watch it again for a multitude of scenes involving Macy’s naked ass. God, what guts. Just watch and you’ll see what I mean.
The second movie was 21 Grams, starring Sean Penn, Naomi Watts and Benecio del Toro. The story involves three strangers whose lives all come together due to the untimely death of a husband and his 2 children. The acting is the not the problem here. The only thing I found fault with was the editing. Jeez, it was like they filmed the damn movie, cut it into 500 pieces, threw those pieces in a hat and picked them out one at a time to put into the final cut. If you can deal with that, you’ll enjoy the performances and the plot immensely.
Comedians You Should Hear
David Cross has two stand up comedy albums everyone should hear. The first is called “Shut Up You Fucking Baby” and his most recent is “It’s Not Funny!” Both contain a good mix of smart, political humor and keen observations about people and things that piss him off. That can range anywhere from ridiculous products (square bagels and electric scissors) to drunk rednecks. I love his comedy because, aside from being funny, it’s strongly opinionated. I know a lot of people think comedy shouldn’t be educational, but those people are retarded. Entertainment should involve thinking, at least from time to time, and David Cross is doing that as well as anyone right now.
The next comedian you should hear is no longer alive because he died of pancreatic cancer close to 10 years ago. His name was Bill Hicks and, quite frankly, the guy may have been a genius. What he did, quite simply, was point out each and every thing that was moronic about the status quo. Whether that meant attacking religion, nonsmokers or the War in Iraq...Bill Hicks was always right on track. His comedy 10 years ago is actually still completely and totally relevant today. Ten years ago he was railing against the Gulf War “distraction” and yet here were are in the present, once again at war in that area. Unfortunately, not a whole lot has changed, despite Bill’s best efforts. One of my favorite things about Hicks’ albums, not withstanding the material...is the liner notes. Every album of his I’ve purchased comes complete with a little leaflet that states, “Warning: This album contains everything your parents hate, everything the church preaches against, everything the Government fears. Enjoy.” Indeed. So pick up any or all of the following: Dangerous, Relentless, Arizona Bay or Rant in E-Minor and be thoroughly challenged and entertained by one of the greatest comic minds to ever come along.
A Statement You Should Read
This is a statement I came across in a chain e-mail. I never forward these goddamned things along, but this one kind of touched me. So, while I’m not technically forwarding it, I am going to share it here to save you the email box space.
It is the testimony of Darrell Scott, the father of a Columbine shooting victim, during his address to a House Judiciary Subcommittee. And while I don’t agree with every word he says, the honesty with which he says it speaks volumes and I thought everyone should read it. It is as follows:
"Since the dawn of creation there has been both good &evil in the hearts of men and women. We all contain the seeds of kindness or the seeds of
violence. The death of my wonderful daughter, Rachel Joy Scott, and the
deaths of that heroic teacher, and the other eleven children who died must not be in vain. Their blood cries out for answers.
"The first recorded act of violence was when Cain slew his brother Abel out in the field. The villain was not the club he used. Neither was it the NCA, the National Club Association. The true killer was Cain, and the reason for the murder could only be found in Cain's heart.
"In the days that followed the Columbine tragedy, I was amazed at how
quickly fingers began to be pointed at groups such as the NRA. I am not a
member of the NRA. I am not a hunter. I do not even own a gun. I am not here to represent or defend the NRA - because I don't believe that they are
responsible for my daughter's death. Therefore I do not believe that they
need to be defended. If I believed they had anything to do with Rachel's
murder I would be their strongest opponent.
I am here today to declare that Columbine was not just a tragedy-it was a
spiritual event that should be forcing us to look at where the real blame
lies! Much of the blame lies here in this room. Much of the blame lies
behind the pointing fingers of the accusers themselves.
"I wrote a poem just four nights ago that expresses my feelings best. This was written way before I knew I would be speaking here today:
Your laws ignore our deepest needs,
Your words are empty air.
You've stripped away our heritage,
You've outlawed simple prayer.
Now gunshots fill our classrooms,
And precious children die.
You seek for answers everywhere,
And ask the question "Why?"
You regulate restrictive laws,
Through legislative creed.
And yet you fail to understand,
That God is what we need!
"Men and women are three-part beings. We all consist of body, soul, and
spirit. When we refuse to acknowledge a third part of our make-up, we create a void that allows evil, prejudice, and hatred to rush in and reek havoc.
Spiritual presences were present within our educational systems for most of our nation's history. Many of our major colleges began as theological
seminaries. This is a historical fact. What has happened to us as a nation?
We have refused to honor God, and in so doing, we open the doors to hatred and violence. And when something as terrible as Columbine's tragedy occurs-- politicians immediately look for a scapegoat such as the NRA. They immediately seek to pass more restrictive laws that contribute to erode away our personal and private liberties. We do not need more restrictive laws.
"Eric and Dylan would not have been stopped by metal detectors. No amount of gun laws can stop someone who spends months planning this type of massacre. The real villain lies within our own hearts.
"As my son Craig lay under that table in the school library and saw his two friends murdered before his very eyes-He did not hesitate to pray in school. I defy any law or politician to deny him that right! I challenge every young person in America, and around the world, to realize that on April 20, 1999, at Columbine High School prayer was brought back to our schools. Do not let the many prayers offered by those students be in vain. Dare to move into the new millennium with a sacred disregard for legislation that violates your God-given right to communicate with Him.
To those of you who would point your finger at the NRA - I give to you a sincere challenge. Dare to examine your own heart before casting the first stone! My daughter's death will not be in vain! The young people of this country will not allow that to happen!"
A couple of days ago I was in the back seat of my parents car being driven back from an afternoon lunch we had together. Once we were about 60 seconds from our house, the song “Freshmen” by the Verve Pipe came on the radio.
Now, I hate most everything on the radio, but this song was big a few years back and I’ve always kind of dug it’s simple melody. This was the first time I’d heard it in quite a while and I was kinda bummed because I knew I wouldn’t get to hear the whole thing. After all, we were almost home.
But just then, like an act of fate, a slow-moving pickup truck pulled out in front of our car from a side street, sputtering the whole way. Well, that 60 second trip turned into about 3 minutes and I was afforded the opportunity to hear the great majority of my song. Sometimes, the simple pleasures really are the best.
STUFF YOU SHOULD DO
These are just my opinions of course, but I have a small list of things everyone should own that I’d like to share.
Music You Should Own
Sludgeworth - “Losers of the Year.” Sludgeworth is a band I’d never heard of until around two years ago when I was searching Interpunk.com for decent music. I’m a big fan of Lookout Record label as they’ve been responsible for many a band that I now enjoy. Sludgeworth isn’t around anymore, but this cd of their best stuff from a few EP’s and LP’s they released in the short time they were together is worth owning. It’s chock full of great power pop songs that everyone should familiarize themselves with. It’s good stuff and I’m glad I bought it.
The Huntingtons - “Self-Titled Album.” These are some really cool guys who release great album after greater album. In an age where many successful bands release one or two radio friendly pop songs to entice people into buying their record brimming with 10 other horrible tunes, the Huntingtons don’t know the meaning of filler...all the songs are hits. It’s just too bad the rest of the country doesn’t know it. Honestly, this may be the group’s final album. It’s a shame too, because I’ve enjoyed every single recording they’ve produced. Do yourself a favor and pick up this album, or any other you can find from this group. Rock n’ Roll!
The Manges - “R Good Enough.” Punk Rock in the United States is on life support and we can all thank MTV and the legions of braindead peons who tune in for screwing it up. This station is guilty of the attempted murder of punk rock, but there’s still a few bands out there carrying the torch. In Europe, in a country called Italy, is one of those very bands...they’re called the Manges. These guys know how to play and they still understand what rock n roll should be about. I’m in their debt, and so are you. Pick up this album and/or anything of theirs you can get off of EBay and enjoy at full volume in your bedroom.
The European Pop Punk Virus - Volumes 1 & 2. These albums are compilations of some of the best rock n’ roll coming out of Europe today. And as much as I’d like to believe otherwise, Europe is producing better bands that this country. If you still in your heart believe that rock music can be great...go find yourself these cd’s and then go find the albums by the bands that have contributed songs to the compilation. Your faith will be restored.
To find any of these releases, go to Interpunk.com and search for them. Interpunk is the best online music store, bar none. They offer reasonable prices on all of their merchandise and they ship fast. They also have a local music section, where you can find bands from your hometown who are selling their merch through the site. Because of that awesome little feature, I’ve been able to find several bands that write good tunes that I plan on following from now on. So head on over to Interpunk and see what you can find in your area.
Television You Should Watch
The Shield is probably the best drama on television right now. A group of dirty cops that protect the peace while getting deeper and deeper into the criminal underworld makes for an entertaining hour every Tuesday night at 10pm. FX, baby!
Cheap Seats is quickly becoming one of my favorite shows. If you haven’t seen it, picture Mystery Science Theater 3000 with a sports theme. And if you haven’t seen Mystery Science Theater, then what the hell is wrong with you? But seriously, it’s two guys named Randy and Jason who watch old sports programming and basically just crack jokes about how lame and cheesy it is. Sometimes it’s kinda stupid, usually it’s insightful, but it’s always funny. I think it’s on Thursdays at 10 now, on ESPN Classics.
Family Plots is one of the best of the “Reality” genre on tv. It follows the life of a family run mortuary and the things they all go through as individuals when certain situations rear their head. For instance, how will the funeral director, who went through the death of his own one year old baby, deal with arranging the funeral of a stillborn infant? This show can be extremely moving at times. It does not shy away from showing the deceased, so squeamish people should beware. However, it has it’s lighter moments too. All in all, it is both education and entertaining. Tune in Mondays at 9pm on A&E.
Movies You Should See
Saw a couple of decent flicks here recently and, ya know, you should see them too.
First was The Cooler. It stars William H. Macy as a guy so unlucky, that the most minute period of interaction with him will change your luck for the worse. He finally meets a girl who loves him for him and his luck changes. The story is set in a casino and features a good performance by Alec Baldwin as well. Pick it up for it’s good acting. Watch it again for a multitude of scenes involving Macy’s naked ass. God, what guts. Just watch and you’ll see what I mean.
The second movie was 21 Grams, starring Sean Penn, Naomi Watts and Benecio del Toro. The story involves three strangers whose lives all come together due to the untimely death of a husband and his 2 children. The acting is the not the problem here. The only thing I found fault with was the editing. Jeez, it was like they filmed the damn movie, cut it into 500 pieces, threw those pieces in a hat and picked them out one at a time to put into the final cut. If you can deal with that, you’ll enjoy the performances and the plot immensely.
Comedians You Should Hear
David Cross has two stand up comedy albums everyone should hear. The first is called “Shut Up You Fucking Baby” and his most recent is “It’s Not Funny!” Both contain a good mix of smart, political humor and keen observations about people and things that piss him off. That can range anywhere from ridiculous products (square bagels and electric scissors) to drunk rednecks. I love his comedy because, aside from being funny, it’s strongly opinionated. I know a lot of people think comedy shouldn’t be educational, but those people are retarded. Entertainment should involve thinking, at least from time to time, and David Cross is doing that as well as anyone right now.
The next comedian you should hear is no longer alive because he died of pancreatic cancer close to 10 years ago. His name was Bill Hicks and, quite frankly, the guy may have been a genius. What he did, quite simply, was point out each and every thing that was moronic about the status quo. Whether that meant attacking religion, nonsmokers or the War in Iraq...Bill Hicks was always right on track. His comedy 10 years ago is actually still completely and totally relevant today. Ten years ago he was railing against the Gulf War “distraction” and yet here were are in the present, once again at war in that area. Unfortunately, not a whole lot has changed, despite Bill’s best efforts. One of my favorite things about Hicks’ albums, not withstanding the material...is the liner notes. Every album of his I’ve purchased comes complete with a little leaflet that states, “Warning: This album contains everything your parents hate, everything the church preaches against, everything the Government fears. Enjoy.” Indeed. So pick up any or all of the following: Dangerous, Relentless, Arizona Bay or Rant in E-Minor and be thoroughly challenged and entertained by one of the greatest comic minds to ever come along.
A Statement You Should Read
This is a statement I came across in a chain e-mail. I never forward these goddamned things along, but this one kind of touched me. So, while I’m not technically forwarding it, I am going to share it here to save you the email box space.
It is the testimony of Darrell Scott, the father of a Columbine shooting victim, during his address to a House Judiciary Subcommittee. And while I don’t agree with every word he says, the honesty with which he says it speaks volumes and I thought everyone should read it. It is as follows:
"Since the dawn of creation there has been both good &evil in the hearts of men and women. We all contain the seeds of kindness or the seeds of
violence. The death of my wonderful daughter, Rachel Joy Scott, and the
deaths of that heroic teacher, and the other eleven children who died must not be in vain. Their blood cries out for answers.
"The first recorded act of violence was when Cain slew his brother Abel out in the field. The villain was not the club he used. Neither was it the NCA, the National Club Association. The true killer was Cain, and the reason for the murder could only be found in Cain's heart.
"In the days that followed the Columbine tragedy, I was amazed at how
quickly fingers began to be pointed at groups such as the NRA. I am not a
member of the NRA. I am not a hunter. I do not even own a gun. I am not here to represent or defend the NRA - because I don't believe that they are
responsible for my daughter's death. Therefore I do not believe that they
need to be defended. If I believed they had anything to do with Rachel's
murder I would be their strongest opponent.
I am here today to declare that Columbine was not just a tragedy-it was a
spiritual event that should be forcing us to look at where the real blame
lies! Much of the blame lies here in this room. Much of the blame lies
behind the pointing fingers of the accusers themselves.
"I wrote a poem just four nights ago that expresses my feelings best. This was written way before I knew I would be speaking here today:
Your laws ignore our deepest needs,
Your words are empty air.
You've stripped away our heritage,
You've outlawed simple prayer.
Now gunshots fill our classrooms,
And precious children die.
You seek for answers everywhere,
And ask the question "Why?"
You regulate restrictive laws,
Through legislative creed.
And yet you fail to understand,
That God is what we need!
"Men and women are three-part beings. We all consist of body, soul, and
spirit. When we refuse to acknowledge a third part of our make-up, we create a void that allows evil, prejudice, and hatred to rush in and reek havoc.
Spiritual presences were present within our educational systems for most of our nation's history. Many of our major colleges began as theological
seminaries. This is a historical fact. What has happened to us as a nation?
We have refused to honor God, and in so doing, we open the doors to hatred and violence. And when something as terrible as Columbine's tragedy occurs-- politicians immediately look for a scapegoat such as the NRA. They immediately seek to pass more restrictive laws that contribute to erode away our personal and private liberties. We do not need more restrictive laws.
"Eric and Dylan would not have been stopped by metal detectors. No amount of gun laws can stop someone who spends months planning this type of massacre. The real villain lies within our own hearts.
"As my son Craig lay under that table in the school library and saw his two friends murdered before his very eyes-He did not hesitate to pray in school. I defy any law or politician to deny him that right! I challenge every young person in America, and around the world, to realize that on April 20, 1999, at Columbine High School prayer was brought back to our schools. Do not let the many prayers offered by those students be in vain. Dare to move into the new millennium with a sacred disregard for legislation that violates your God-given right to communicate with Him.
To those of you who would point your finger at the NRA - I give to you a sincere challenge. Dare to examine your own heart before casting the first stone! My daughter's death will not be in vain! The young people of this country will not allow that to happen!"
Thursday, May 20, 2004
A NEW JOB
Kornbus got a job. Good for you, Kornbus.
Yeah, that’s right....a man has gotta feel responsible for the welfare of his environment. Therefore, I took a job as a collections agent in what has to be considered to be one of the top moronic moves on my lifetime. I’ll explain.
I took the position at UCB, one of the nation’s top collection firms. I wasn’t too excited about it, really. Honestly, who actually pines to be one of those people who calls you up non-stop trying to get money? Not me. But I needed a job, so I took it. I figured it wouldn’t be so bad. Well, it turns out it is bad. Really bad. Evil, even.
It isn’t so much the part about calling up old women and hassling them for the final 3 payments on their oxygen tank. If grandma wants to breathe, grandma has got to pay, right? No, it wasn’t things like that which make me want to quit. It’s more in the way of how the company pits their employees against one another for the opportunity of advancement and/or commissions.
I wasn’t in training for more than a day before I realized how big of an error in judgment I had made coming to work there. The Operation Manager who hired me came to our class and passed out various papers explaining the nature of the business. Fine. It was pretty much all cut and dry anyway. But then he delved into how the collectors go out of their way to steal their fellow associates’ money. For instance: If a man has agreed to a payment plan with one collector to alleviate his debt, and another collector calls him at a later date and gets the man to pay it off quicker, collector #2 reaps all the awards. It doesn’t matter that collector #1 initiated the whole process. #2 will gladly accept the fruits of their labor.
Everyone in my class thought this was pretty sick. Rightly so, I might add. But it turns out that our trainer, a woman that apparently hails from deep within the heart of Ghettonia, began to brag about her former exploits as well. She explained that she used to “love it” when she could call up debtors who already made payment arrangements with a prior representative. You see, she would just get them to pay it off a little quicker so she could accept the bonus the original rep thought they had coming to them. She spoke with great enthusiasm as she detailed her many cases of legalized thievery. It sounded as if she just couldn’t wait to get her ass back in front of a phone to do it over and over again. She also promised she would teach us the tricks of the trade. I wanted to puke.
Well, it turns out that my mom knows a few people who used to work there. And why is it that they no longer do? Because they were sick of being cheated out of the commissions that they believed were rightly theirs, of course. They grew really tired really quick of getting their paycheck and being shortchanged. Who can blame them?
So, I can’t stay at this place. It’s one thing to have the debtors hate your guts...but I am NOT going to engage in twisted little games of oneupsmanship in order to gain a few extra dollars a month at the expense of a colleague. I’m just not going to do that. It’s wrong and it should go against any decent person’s moral code.
After I quit, which will probably be tomorrow, I am going to apply at various little shops and stores in my neighborhood. Will it be less money? Yes. Will I receive less hours? Probably. But will I have to cut someone else’s throat for an extra buck? Hell no. And that suits me just fine.
Kornbus got a job. Good for you, Kornbus.
Yeah, that’s right....a man has gotta feel responsible for the welfare of his environment. Therefore, I took a job as a collections agent in what has to be considered to be one of the top moronic moves on my lifetime. I’ll explain.
I took the position at UCB, one of the nation’s top collection firms. I wasn’t too excited about it, really. Honestly, who actually pines to be one of those people who calls you up non-stop trying to get money? Not me. But I needed a job, so I took it. I figured it wouldn’t be so bad. Well, it turns out it is bad. Really bad. Evil, even.
It isn’t so much the part about calling up old women and hassling them for the final 3 payments on their oxygen tank. If grandma wants to breathe, grandma has got to pay, right? No, it wasn’t things like that which make me want to quit. It’s more in the way of how the company pits their employees against one another for the opportunity of advancement and/or commissions.
I wasn’t in training for more than a day before I realized how big of an error in judgment I had made coming to work there. The Operation Manager who hired me came to our class and passed out various papers explaining the nature of the business. Fine. It was pretty much all cut and dry anyway. But then he delved into how the collectors go out of their way to steal their fellow associates’ money. For instance: If a man has agreed to a payment plan with one collector to alleviate his debt, and another collector calls him at a later date and gets the man to pay it off quicker, collector #2 reaps all the awards. It doesn’t matter that collector #1 initiated the whole process. #2 will gladly accept the fruits of their labor.
Everyone in my class thought this was pretty sick. Rightly so, I might add. But it turns out that our trainer, a woman that apparently hails from deep within the heart of Ghettonia, began to brag about her former exploits as well. She explained that she used to “love it” when she could call up debtors who already made payment arrangements with a prior representative. You see, she would just get them to pay it off a little quicker so she could accept the bonus the original rep thought they had coming to them. She spoke with great enthusiasm as she detailed her many cases of legalized thievery. It sounded as if she just couldn’t wait to get her ass back in front of a phone to do it over and over again. She also promised she would teach us the tricks of the trade. I wanted to puke.
Well, it turns out that my mom knows a few people who used to work there. And why is it that they no longer do? Because they were sick of being cheated out of the commissions that they believed were rightly theirs, of course. They grew really tired really quick of getting their paycheck and being shortchanged. Who can blame them?
So, I can’t stay at this place. It’s one thing to have the debtors hate your guts...but I am NOT going to engage in twisted little games of oneupsmanship in order to gain a few extra dollars a month at the expense of a colleague. I’m just not going to do that. It’s wrong and it should go against any decent person’s moral code.
After I quit, which will probably be tomorrow, I am going to apply at various little shops and stores in my neighborhood. Will it be less money? Yes. Will I receive less hours? Probably. But will I have to cut someone else’s throat for an extra buck? Hell no. And that suits me just fine.
Thursday, May 13, 2004
JUST CALL ME REVEREND
On April 1st, April Fool’s Day, I was ordained as a Reverend in the Church of Universal Life....and that’s no joke.
Universal Life Church provides free legal ordination of anyone for the asking online. All you have to do is go to www.ulchq.com and click on “Ordination.” There you can fill out a brief request to be ordained. Within a week or two you will receive your credentials by mail. It’s pretty simple and I gotta admit it’s kinda fun as well.
As a Reverend, I can ordain others, officiate weddings and funerals as well as baptize, among other things. Now this doesn’t mean I’m gonna go around doing any of these things. In fact, the very idea that I am an ordained minister may be considered sacriligious to some people. But the point is that I am. So if you don’t like it...go to Hell! Seriously, I think I can say that with some measure of expertise backing me up now.
WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE?
Remember when this show was funny? For the past 5 years at least, this one time late night staple has sucked big time. I don’t even know who to blame...there is so much wrong it’s hard to point the finger in just one direction. The writing has been crummy. The acting and delivery has been bush league. The edge to that show is just gone.
I know it can be better than this. I really don’t think they’re trying to hard enough to be cutting edge anymore. They seem to be content with mediocrity over there at 30 Rockefeller Center.
It’s not that I don’t think the talent there is good. I honestly believe the performers themselves are funny people. But there is a world of difference between being funny and being funny on television. It’s two totally different worlds.
That’s all I really want to say for right now. I really just wanted to briefly let everyone know that I think SNL is horrible right now. But soon enough, I am going to write a column going over point by point how to help right the ship that is SNL...because right now that ship is sinking.
DETROIT LIONS DRAFT OVERVIEW; SEASON PREVIEW
Ok, just briefly I feel like waxing moronic about the Detroit Lions 2004 draft picks and my outlook for their season. Join me, won’t you?
Draft Overview
The Lions had, in my opinion, the best draft of the year and probably the best draft of the last couple years. They were able to grab some impact players at several positions early and often...without giving much up.
First up was Roy Williams, standout wide receiver from Texas. This was a great first pick. I figured they would take TE Kellen Winslow or S Sean Taylor, but I have to admit, I like this choice better. Check out our receiver corps now! We got Roy Williams on one side with last years first rounder Charles Rogers on the other. Add to that Az-Zahir Hakim and Tai Streets and my Lions could have one of the most potent receiver threats in the league. If Joey Harrington can’t produce some numbers this year, it may be time to look for a new QB. I love the guy, personally. He’s nice, humble and conducts himself with a lot of maturity...which is a lot more than you can say for too many NFL players. He’s been in the league for two full seasons now, neither one showing much in terms of stats. However, he has demonstrated moments of brilliance...and he has too many weapons at his disposal now to have another crappy year. So I’m very optimistic. I’m rooting for you, Joey H.
Kevin Jones was our second first round pick...a great move shuffling draft order by GM Matt Millen. In probaby the only great move Millen has made in his tenure in Detroit, we were able to select this awesome RB from Virginia Tech. With him in the backfield along with a healthy Artose Pinner, things are looking up for the Lions’ ground game.
On the defensive side of the ball, we were able to snatch Teddy Lehman, a linebacker from Oklahoma. This guy won the Butkus Award for his defense, so I was extremely please to have him on our side. I look for him to make a difference for us early...I think he may be that damn good.
Season Outlook
My Lions have had a pretty lame past several years, rarely finishing the year anywhere except dead last in our division. I was very optimistic last year with the hiring of Coach Mariucci...but we only managed to win 5 games (still none on the road). Admittedly, that was better than the year before that, but it still sucks. However, the injury bug bit us on the ass something awful. Damn near half our roster was out most of the season. We’re getting everyone healthy right now and when the seaon starts, I’m looking forward to doing much better. Our schedule this year may be one of the toughest in the league...it seems we’re playing all of the top teams. That pisses me off a little, but I guess in a way it’ll be a good test. Still, I expect us to go .500 this year.
On April 1st, April Fool’s Day, I was ordained as a Reverend in the Church of Universal Life....and that’s no joke.
Universal Life Church provides free legal ordination of anyone for the asking online. All you have to do is go to www.ulchq.com and click on “Ordination.” There you can fill out a brief request to be ordained. Within a week or two you will receive your credentials by mail. It’s pretty simple and I gotta admit it’s kinda fun as well.
As a Reverend, I can ordain others, officiate weddings and funerals as well as baptize, among other things. Now this doesn’t mean I’m gonna go around doing any of these things. In fact, the very idea that I am an ordained minister may be considered sacriligious to some people. But the point is that I am. So if you don’t like it...go to Hell! Seriously, I think I can say that with some measure of expertise backing me up now.
WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE?
Remember when this show was funny? For the past 5 years at least, this one time late night staple has sucked big time. I don’t even know who to blame...there is so much wrong it’s hard to point the finger in just one direction. The writing has been crummy. The acting and delivery has been bush league. The edge to that show is just gone.
I know it can be better than this. I really don’t think they’re trying to hard enough to be cutting edge anymore. They seem to be content with mediocrity over there at 30 Rockefeller Center.
It’s not that I don’t think the talent there is good. I honestly believe the performers themselves are funny people. But there is a world of difference between being funny and being funny on television. It’s two totally different worlds.
That’s all I really want to say for right now. I really just wanted to briefly let everyone know that I think SNL is horrible right now. But soon enough, I am going to write a column going over point by point how to help right the ship that is SNL...because right now that ship is sinking.
DETROIT LIONS DRAFT OVERVIEW; SEASON PREVIEW
Ok, just briefly I feel like waxing moronic about the Detroit Lions 2004 draft picks and my outlook for their season. Join me, won’t you?
Draft Overview
The Lions had, in my opinion, the best draft of the year and probably the best draft of the last couple years. They were able to grab some impact players at several positions early and often...without giving much up.
First up was Roy Williams, standout wide receiver from Texas. This was a great first pick. I figured they would take TE Kellen Winslow or S Sean Taylor, but I have to admit, I like this choice better. Check out our receiver corps now! We got Roy Williams on one side with last years first rounder Charles Rogers on the other. Add to that Az-Zahir Hakim and Tai Streets and my Lions could have one of the most potent receiver threats in the league. If Joey Harrington can’t produce some numbers this year, it may be time to look for a new QB. I love the guy, personally. He’s nice, humble and conducts himself with a lot of maturity...which is a lot more than you can say for too many NFL players. He’s been in the league for two full seasons now, neither one showing much in terms of stats. However, he has demonstrated moments of brilliance...and he has too many weapons at his disposal now to have another crappy year. So I’m very optimistic. I’m rooting for you, Joey H.
Kevin Jones was our second first round pick...a great move shuffling draft order by GM Matt Millen. In probaby the only great move Millen has made in his tenure in Detroit, we were able to select this awesome RB from Virginia Tech. With him in the backfield along with a healthy Artose Pinner, things are looking up for the Lions’ ground game.
On the defensive side of the ball, we were able to snatch Teddy Lehman, a linebacker from Oklahoma. This guy won the Butkus Award for his defense, so I was extremely please to have him on our side. I look for him to make a difference for us early...I think he may be that damn good.
Season Outlook
My Lions have had a pretty lame past several years, rarely finishing the year anywhere except dead last in our division. I was very optimistic last year with the hiring of Coach Mariucci...but we only managed to win 5 games (still none on the road). Admittedly, that was better than the year before that, but it still sucks. However, the injury bug bit us on the ass something awful. Damn near half our roster was out most of the season. We’re getting everyone healthy right now and when the seaon starts, I’m looking forward to doing much better. Our schedule this year may be one of the toughest in the league...it seems we’re playing all of the top teams. That pisses me off a little, but I guess in a way it’ll be a good test. Still, I expect us to go .500 this year.
